


Voldemort's Secret

by ArtemisLiCa



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-16
Updated: 2011-02-16
Packaged: 2017-10-15 17:09:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/163001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtemisLiCa/pseuds/ArtemisLiCa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lucius goes to report to the Dark Lord and discovers Voldemort's secret.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Voldemort's Secret

Lucius Malfoy walked down the hallway in Riddle Manor rehearsing in his mind the speech he was about to give to the Dark Lord. Maybe if he phrased it just right, by the time the Dark Lord figured out he didn’t like what Lucius had to tell him Lucius could already be back in Malfoy Manor sharing a drink with Severus and someone else would be getting tortured.

Wearing the appropriate mixture of arrogance and subservience on his face, Lucius opened the door to Lord Voldemort’s bedroom and stuck his head inside. He opened his mouth to address the Dark Lord, but no words came out.

Lord Voldemort was in the center of his bedroom, holding his hairbrush up to his lips in a strange manner. Lucius had always wondered why a man without hair kept a hairbrush. Before Lucius had processed this strange sight enough to speak, he suddenly heard music begin to play.

Lucius’ jaw dropped as he watched the Dark Lord begin to dance. And sing.

“ _I’m too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love, love’s going to leave me_.”

Lucius watched Voldemort stroke Nagini.

“ _I’m too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts_ …”

Voldemort began to strip off his shirt as he continued to sing.

“ _I’m too sexy for your party, too sexy for your party, no way I’m disco dancing…I’m a model, you know what I mean, and I do my little turn on the catwalk, yeah, on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah, I do my little turn on the catwalk…”_

Voldemort began to strut around the room and pose.

Lucius--> O.o WTF?!

“ _I shake my little tush on the catwalk_!”

Lucius slowly, quietly shut the door to the Dark Lord’s bedroom and turned and walked back down the hallway he had come from. He staggered a little as he tried to process what he had just seen. The sudden sound of Bellatrix’s laughter brought him out of his shock. He straightened and put his cold, arrogant Slytherin mask back into place.

He walked down the hallway with a purposeful stride. He needed to find Severus. He already had a pensieve back a Malfoy Manor. Lucius snickered. Fortunately for the poor house-elf he passed at that moment, he was too caught up in the memory to notice the way the elf looked at him as if he were crazier than Bellatrix LeStrange.

 


End file.
